Myth Buster

My friend and I recently had a debate on whether this exists. I told her it did, and she said, "White frosting? You mean, vanilla? I think it always says vanilla on the can. Or cream cheese." And I said, "No no no, they do have just a 'white', as wonderful a flavor descriptor as that is."

Here it is, people. Create an opportunity for yourself to taste "white".

dummkopf

There're many phrases for someone who either isn't smart or right in the head. For example:

"lost his marbles",
"the engine's running but no one's behind the wheel",
"a few cards short of a full deck",
"bats in the belfry",

boxes of rocks, sharpest knives, brightest bulbs... yadda yadda. Some of these phrases date back before medieval England. However, we still have Cletuses and Jane Eyres in the modern age, so kind soul that I am, I thought I'd come up with a 21st century phrase.

"Low on Minutes."

You heard it here first.

The Gores

Awww... the Gores broked up... poor Al and Tipper. Al comes off as such a dad, it's weird to think of him as a swingin' single... but pretty soon, he'll be ready to crack open some other woman's "lockbox." I can see him prepping for dates, listening to Saga's "On the Loose" on his cassette deck.

"No one can stop us now... tonight - we're - on- the - loose..."


[end scene]

appetizing?

For some reason, I'm nervous to actually eat here.

vanity plates

So, I've been thinking about vanity license plates lately. Generally, my consensus boils down to a simple equation:

vanity plate = douche bag

However, I like to parody the things other people enjoy (NJOY?)... so, naturally I must also ponder what kind of vanity plate I'd get if a woodchuck could chuck wood.

Here are some contenders:

ME N CAR (gotta love the obvious)

MCMXCVI (1996 in roman numerals. Funny? No. But imagine the confusion and car accidents I could cause)

BADRVR

STOLEN

DUH (eloquent!!)

HONK

Plus, I like this diagram. http://cheezburger.com/view.aspx?ciid=3773030

no "whats"

I have a comment section where you can pick "what??" to indicate back to me when I've fell completely off the random wagon. To-date, I have no "what??" scores. I guess that means I make more sense than I thought. (or no one is reading these)

See, Dr. Carpenter? I'm ready to leave the halfway house.

internetz fun

I highly recommend you go through this exercise of hilarity.

1. Find a paragraph of random sales info (for example, halloween costumes) on the internet.

2. Copy that paragraph.

3. Enter the text into babelfish.altavista.com.

4. Translate it from English to whatever other language.

5. Take the translated text, copy/paste, and translate back into English.

Enjoy!

***

Le recomiendo altamente paso con este ejercicio del hilarity. 1. Encuentre un párrafo de las ventas al azar Info (por ejemplo, trajes de víspera de Todos los Santos) en el Internet. 2. Copie ese párrafo. 3. Incorpore el texto en babelfish.altavista.com. 4. Tradúzcalo de inglés a lo que la otra lengua. 5. Tome el texto traducido, copie/goma, y lo traducen nuevamente dentro de inglés. ¡Goce!

***

I highly recommend passage to him with this exercise of hilarity.

1. It at random finds a paragraph of the sales Info (for example, suits of eve of All the Saints) in the Internet.

2. It copies that paragraph.

3. It incorporates the text in babelfish.altavista.com.

4. Tradúzcalo of English to which the other language.

5. It takes the translated text, it copies/rubber, they again translate and it within English.

Enjoyment!

hmmm...

Can you guess the name of this song? It's hard to tell.

Be good be good
Be good be good be good
Be good be good be good be good (johnny)
Be good be good
Be good be good be good
Be good be good be good
Be good be good be good
Be good be good be good
Be good be good be good
Be good be good be good
Be good be good be good
Be good be good be good
Be good be good be good
Be good be good be good
Johnny!

hand hole

This box was sitting next to me on a picnic table yesterday. Fascinating.

execs

Confucius may or may not agree, but *I* say - senior business leaders shouldn't talk about the "low-hanging fruit" while wearing tight pants.